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Time to own the word ‘slut’

bra and panties

JUST THE TIP

It’s been 100 years since women got the federal vote in Canada. Then close to 70 years passed by before the criminalization of wife rape and the recognition of “no fault” divorce. Women have come a long way in the past century. And yet there are still some “old-fashioned” values lurking around…

Slut shaming. While some men may experience this phenomenon, it’s typically directed at women. The idea that it’s shameful to be promiscuous. Luckily, this idea is losing traction, but it’s still hiding in the shadows and pointing fingers at innocent passersby.

So here’s my declaration: stop it. Stop gossiping about women (and men) you perceive to be more “experimental.” Stop using “slut” with negative connotations. Stop guessing about other people’s sexuality altogether. Just stop it.

Who cares? Why does it matter to you? Does it affect you in any way? These are questions worth considering. It’s better to live and let live. Besides, there’s a much more important message here. Sluts are amazing. Sluts might just be the most generous people you will ever meet in your life.

I understand some people are less interested in sex, which is fine. But there are lots of people who definitely spend a lot of time thinking about sex. And never share it. It’s so sad that so many people have to hide a part of themselves because of the judgement associated with it. I think sluts should be proud. It’s time to own the word “slut.”

Anyone can be a slut. It doesn’t necessarily mean “unattached sex” either. It can be with a partner, multiple times a day. It could also be with multiple partners, multiple times a day. I want the word slut to mean “someone who enjoys sex.” So let’s stop pretending sex is in any way “shameful.” The old belief that sex is purely for procreation died a long time ago. Sex is all about having a good time – for everyone involved.

Now, I’m not entirely condoning overtly sexual behaviour. Some of it is deviant and can be related to past traumas. To those people I say, talk to a therapist and seek positive interactions. For everyone else … stop being ashamed. It’s OK to enjoy sex. Sex is fun. If you don’t think sex is fun, please see the beginning of this paragraph.

So go out there, be you and be proud of it! Whether you’re a slut or not, love yourself. Don’t let other people shame you into hiding your identity. After nearly four decades of the Pride Festival in Edmonton, let’s shake these old ideals. And remember: Takes chances, make mistakes and get messy!

– Arielle Trischuk

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