I don’t know a lot about the struggles of LGBTQ2+ individuals. I just know that Pride week is fun and drag is amazing. But I live with a bisexual woman who had issues with not just society but even the LGBTQ2+ community. After discussing it with other friends who have struggled the same way, I knew that this was a story that needs to be talked about.
I asked her to write about her struggles with being a bisexual in today’s age of freedom:
Pepsi or Coke. Chocolate or Vanilla. Women or Men.
It is unfortunate that society only thinks that two of the three of these can be answered with both. You can love chocolate and still think vanilla is still pretty good. When asked Coke or Pepsi, you might prefer Coke, but are OK with Pepsi. However, if you say that you like women and men, then something is obviously amiss.
I realized I was bisexual when I was about 13 and found that I had the same crush on Laura that I did on Joel. I knew my mum was LGBTQ2+ positive so I thought it was okay to tell her I am Bi. She told me it was just a phase. Over 17 years later I am still in that phase. At first I thought that maybe she just wasn’t as OK with the gay community as she said. Then I got older and started making more and more friends who were also part of that gay community and I got the same negative attitude.
I’ve heard that I should pick a side, or that my attraction to both was attention seeking. Maybe I was too scared to admit I was really a lesbian. All this from a community that is still trying to be accepted globally as just the people they are. The LGBTQ2+ community has made leaps and bounds over recent years, but bisexuals still get discriminated for choosing both.
At this point, there are so many labels. Bisexual. Pansexual. Asexual. Gay. Lesbian. Two-Spirited. Transgender. It is too much. It puts you into a stereotypical box that predetermines people’s views of you.
Now when asked what my orientation is, I say Kris.
Romantic orientation? Kris.
Sexually orientation? Kris.
Gender Identity? Kris.
Sexual Preference? Kris.
There are a lot of young people who are starting to realize that the content of a person’s pants doesn’t matter to them. I would like to think that as they come into their own, in this new age of freedoms they don’t have to worry about negative and outdated assumptions.
People should understand that you can have all the Neapolitan flavours. You should be able to look at Tom Hiddleston and Emma Watson and say, “Both? Both. Both is good.” The LGBTQ2+ community should stand for accepting people for who they are, not what they are.
–Kris Boulton
